In email signatures, probably misappropriated famous person picture/quote thing on Facebook and tumblr posts, I see these profound statements on life. These great writers, scientists, artists, humanitarians will evoke these precise phrases about how it is to live. Even though the proverbial ship has sailed off into the sea without me, I hope to be known for my awesometastic writing skills (just like this!) and I fear my life quotes won’t be as eloquent. Here are some examples:
-Monkeys are always funny
-We all can’t be Jesus
-Just because it fits, doesn’t mean you should wear it.
-Who wants to fuck this log?
-There’s a cookie in my whore
-Just like the freaks, the wolves come out at night.
-Where is your devil donkey hole?
-It’s not accidental, there is a cake!
While all of these statements are true they are no “Be the change you wish to see in the world”. Though I could just say that is me right? No one would know the difference. Just take a picture of me, lets say this one:
Now post it to Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, whatever. And it is me. I did that!!! See even the faker who supposedly said “first” didn’t even actually say it.
I think that means it is up for grabs and I am taking it.
I am now a famous quotess with a great statement on life. One that will carry forward into time and space (hopefully on the side of one of those fancy space shippy things). Thank you all for believing in me and helping to carry my legacy forward. I appreciate your support and know that I am trying to answer all of your emails as quickly as I can. Being a famous quotess is taxing at times and coming up with the “next big thing” is daunting can be hard. You know. Actually you don’t because this is my cross to bear (we still cool Jeezy? Great).
I am so glad that through the course of this post I have fixed my issue. You can all take a deep breath and know that the world is a bit safer now that my advice on life and living is circulating.