I made it to 50 yayay! I didn’t realize it was part 50 until I looked up the title so the list is bloated but it isn’t because this is a special episode or anything. I have become a music sponge as of late– I spend most of my days listening to music and sometimes the same thing over and over again. Blurred Lines is still in heavy rotation, as is Latch by Disclosure. I am usually a girl who balances the music with podcasts and tv/movies but at the moment it is mostly music.
It is the tail end of your Labor Day weekend (America!) so time for your last BBQs and Summer Sex before you have to put away that white linen suit and say goodbye to Diddy and Barefoot Contessa at the Hamptons. Get all your jollies out now before you have to go to real life or whatever you call life. Enjoy these songs which I assume will make you : dance, clap, swoon, or be awesome. I think I covered my usual tropes.
Addendum: I loosely based most of these descriptions around a Diddy Labor Day weekend white party in the Hamptons. I know of this happening once but do not know if it is a tradition or not. However I am obsessed with the idea and use the idea for many conversations.
I know the Goodie Mob have been around for a long ass time, but I have no familiarity with this group except name alone. Also that CeeLo is in this group or as my mom calls him, Cleo. This song is driven and head-bouncy. I really hoped CeeLo was petting a white pussy throughout this video but sadly there was none. The song sounds like it is trying to be in the next spy/cop movie soundtrack to pair with Sabotage which is actually a good thing. Use this song to sneakly enter the Diddy labor day party.
This song literally pulls from the Beastie Boys while the last song just evoked that feeling. I had stopped listening to Eminem not because the music was horrible but because he was. I know I know. However it was my own choice that I never forced on anyone else. Then everyone is talking about this song so my curiosity makes me listen and I get this gem of a song. It is history of rap beats layered with Eminem’s flow. So how can I resist this? It is also hard and driven like the Goodie Mob song so they work well together. Emimem’s voice is a bit drowned out by the music but my nostalgia heart takes over in the liking room. I feel Diddy would enjoy this song if you happened to tell the DJ to throw this baby on. Or do they hate each other? Or are they all too rich to care?
D: You got your caviar in my Cristal!
E: NO good sir, you got your Cristal in my caviar.
Both: hardy laugh.
D: How about we burn some money together and have these bikini girls twirl for us good chap?
E: Pip Pip.
Still baffled at how long it took me to find and love this song, but I know now and will be forever grateful. This beautiful melodic song is in heavy rotation in my favorites list. A sixteen-ish girl who sings with such presence and beauty which goes throughout her entire EP. The way I have been describing Lorde is a less affected, less ethereal Lana Del Rey. While I love Lana Del Rey, Lorde has more purity in her voice and more dance beats in her songs. I think that Barefoot Contessa will fake like this song but at least one of her gays will love the shit out it.
This song is very Billy Bragg-esque. I think that should be enough to let you know if you will like it or not. You might end up in a corner crying over your scotch listening to this song. Maybe because Serena wouldn’t look at you the way she did before the summer started or maybe you just found out your cougar is married. Or maybe you are an adult with adult problems like alcoholism.
A song that evokes The Band’s Up on Ripple Creek. So yes it is good- so so good. If no one likes this at your labor day party, punch them in their shady face and say “dry clean that dickface”. I really like this song if you haven’t guessed.
It is time to bring this party down a bit. Time for a groove that will get all the people in the mood for woo. This swoooooonalicious song features the pairing of girl butter and boy butter. Slap on those skates and start the slow skate with your boo. I don’t think Diddy will mind. He maybe even have a skate cellar, which sounds super dangerous.
This is like a good Sting song. Oops like what Sting would be doing if he was good. Harsh? I think they are some funky European group. You can introduce International music to this party while you are drinking your Aperol Spritz.
My new flavor of butter is Sam Smith and I will listen to anything he does. This may not make sense but it is a bit of a less electronic Disclosure song. Sam Smith also sings on the Disclosure song Latch. Also butter. I suggest eating a Eat a kabob and jamming to this song. No idea why I said kabob but now I am craving one with some tzatziki and pita. Get on that minions.
Okay this song sounds like a Eurovision song that probably lost the contest before even getting to Eurovision. It happens to be CATCHY AS ALL FUCK. You may develop a crack habit after listening to this song. You have been warned.
This is the theme for Orange is the New Black which is the show everyone is watching. I have not yet watched this show because I need to rebel against populace for a bit longer before I cave. This song sound like Regina Spektor but then moves away from her typical style a bit. It is fun so it encourages vodka and talking to people and sharing your amazing adventures with your convertible ride with a badger. Or you could talk about Orange is the New Black which maybe the same thing.
Dear God this song and video are pure sweaty sex. If you didn’t get a bit of action with the butter on butter jam before, then this song should do it. If it doesn’t get you some-tang, step up your game bro! C’mon bro I know you can do it. Start a wet t-shirt contest. No that is creepy. A eat whip cream off of your body contest? No that is worse. I dunno, just do it.
I kind of hoped this would be a Mister Mister cover band but sadly I was wrong. However this is a great Florence + The Machine clone complete with the red hair. As for the Barefoot Contessa, she and the hobbit hubbie are heading back to the Shire before late night snacksies hits. He had a bit too much of Gandalf’s Magic Pipe. If you know what I mean.
Do you like 90s R&B groups with rap breaks? Then you will love this song a lot since it reminds me a bit of EnVogue. You will then have no need to have Spotify shame you into remembering how old you were when EnVogue was popular. You will be a hip-cat and still like what you like. No need to fear change when the cycle comes back to zero.
If you like the music of Antony but you don’t like his voice (which is gold BTW) this is the song for you. So beautiful, stripped down and pure emotion. And the butter voice. Some English butter that spreads so easy on your crumpets. No jam needed with this song. Just enjoy. Hold down Lil Jon (he is here right?) and make him listen.
15. Little Mix – DNA
More shambercrack This one isn’t as Shambery but the video is something else. There is some not good bondage going on. Crazy girls to the max. However, I am dancing like a fool to this song.
This song comes from the awesome show Hemlock Grove. It creates so many fantasies of the yummy guys on the show making out with each other. This song makes me weep out of the pure sweetness and emotion that rolls of me. But then I think of hot werewolf and vampire make-out sessions and everything is okay. You should relay this story to JayZ if he is there. And tell him if the can make Picasso Baby a song of relevance, he surely can make the Penises Kiss.
Babyshambles is one of the great band names of all time that also has great rocking songs. I love when I listen to a band for the name and then they live up to being great music. So much happy is created for me that I think you could spread my happy to the sourpusses at the party. You could Pete Doherty the situation but there probably isn’t enough Heroin in the Hamptons to affect change.
This song combines nostalgia with learning about a great new artist. Charli XCX is apart of the Icona Pop song “I Love It” which is a great dance pop song. Charli XCX also does great dance pop songs so you should check her out more. You can make the DJ play this song at the end of the night to get everyone swaying and singing together. Maybe some impromptu Backstreet Boys dance moves might start happening. A perfect way to end a perfect Labor Day party.