Things I Learned From the Weekend

I had a head cold that took me out of active service on Friday, Saturday and part of Sunday so while I couldn’t go out and be with people, I stayed home and learned things from my couch.

  • I know most of the words to all of the songs in Sound of Music. I also wanna watch it right now. Like RIGHT NOW.
  • Sixteen Going on Seventeen is my favorite Misogynistic song ever.
    Lines like:
    You need someone older and wiser
    Telling you what to do
    I am seventeen going on eighteen
    I’ll take care of you
    Makes me feel so dis-empowered and full of dance!!
  • I don’t know the songs in Mary Poppins as much as I thought I did. I learned the harsh truths about my what is my favorite Julie Andrews becomes a super-nanny movie.

  • I tried to build some sort of link between Mary Poppins (set in 1910s) and Sound of Music (set in 1930s/40s) and all I came up with is that Mary Poppins lost her “magic” and maybe some of her memory and ended up in a nunnery in Austria. She said Mary and they changed it to Maria and the rest is history.
  • American Horror Story- Asylum is creepy as fuck. I will keep watching it but it may need to be the sunniest days with all the lights on in the house.

    was going to share an image of AHS- Asylum but hell nope. I don't need nightmares.
    was going to share an image of AHS- Asylum but hell nope. I don’t need nightmares.
  • Learned about this beautiful artist named FKA Twigs. Her voice is great and the songs are often super sexy. She is also dating Robert Pattinson (I can’t help what I learn)
  • Zoolander still hilarious. 

    Orange Mocha Frappuccinos!!
    Orange Mocha Frappuccinos!!
  • The Alchemist  by Paulo Coelho is a huge waste of paper and needs to be buried in a fire. I hope to god that no aliens find this book and decide to judge our world based on it. I really don’t want to be judged on platitudes about destiny and dreams. Just fucking do it. Don’t read a book and think some more.  Seriously Nike summarized that book with three words and a swoosh. So don’t buy the Alchemist, buy some Nikes.
  • Peter Capaldi as the Doctor has made me excited again about Doctor Who. Also I really like all things Robin Hood.
    Doctor Who Series 8
  • The Streamys exist. They are an awards show that honor people in digital media. It was an award show filled with awkward banter to the extreme between award presenters.  Grace Helbig and Hannah Hart were on fire and hilarious.
    4th Annual Streamy Awards Presented By Coca-Cola - Inside
  • We Were Liars by E. Lockhart is an amazing book that barreled through in  an evening. I wish I could tell you more but you should know the least about the book as possible. I swear it is a book worth reading and if for some reason you are broken then it won’t take long to read the book unless you are a snail. PSA (Public Snail Announcement): Snails don’t read this book. Stick to something much shorter like Pat the Bunny. Definitely do not read “Taste the Salt”. Got it snails?

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